Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
- How tall is he? (I believe this one is the most important question, but that's just me...narcotics smarcotics, I say)
- What's his last name? (For google searches and such...)
- Does he have a job?
- Does he have a place of residence?
- Has he declared bankruptcy in the last 5 to 7 years?
- Does he have a history of drug or alcohol addiction?
- What was his family life like? Is he close to his mother? Does he have a dad?
- Is he bondable? (We didn't even get around to this...coffee was only 40 minutes...we ran out of time to discuss criminal history...)
- Does he have a
crazyalcoholic ex that arbitrarily pops in and out of his life, causing chaos and mayhem along the way? (Leave out the crazy...I'm pretty sure every guy on the face of the earth thinks his ex is crazy...)
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
- Two parking tickets. Two. At work, we have to pay for parking. You can only pay for 3 hours at a time, so you have to run out 3 hours into your shift and plug the meter. I always, always forget - as evidenced by the parking tickets. That meter maid is stalking my car, I just know it. I don't think it's coincidence that I get a ticket mere minutes after the meter expires.
- Two conflicts with employees. Another huge one this evening. Sometimes I cannot believe the things that I have to say to adults, but these words actually came out of my mouth tonight, "If you yell at a supervisor again, you will - at the very least - be issued a 24 (disciplinary) for insubordination. Do you understand me?" In the unbelievable file: One day I had to tell an employee three times that my expectation was that he stayed awake during his shift. THREE times.
- Twice I was putting an elastic band around tags with it snapped and hit my thumb in the exact same place. It stings the first time. It really makes you want to swear the second time around.
- Two is the number of fingers I slammed in a drawer. Not just any drawer, but one of those old desks that is solid wood. I said a certain word that starts with "F" and ends with "uck" after that one. Twice. My finger still hurts, by the way.
- Two times this week I had to scrape my windows. I know, I know I shouldn't complain. Especially since Alberta is getting slammed with a snow storm as we speak (or as I write...) But, ugh...after 8 hours at work and an hour on the train (both ways)- the absolute last thing I want to do is scrape ice off my windows. Oh, and -2...coincidence? I think not. (That's -2 degree's celcius of course. I have no idea what that is for my US friends)
- Two people I will be missing very much this weekend. I was so super excited that my best friend and her newborn baby girl were coming for the weekend. Disclaimer: (Best friend reads this) The content of item #6 is in no way meant to make said BFF have feelings of guilt, sadness, or any other negative type feelings. I mean, if my doctor told me, "If it was my baby, I wouldn't be taking her on an airplane during flu season," I wouldn't either. Oh, who am I kidding? I probably would take that to mean that it was not safe to leave the house for the next 3 months. But I was really looking forward to meeting baby K, and having some girl-bonding time with my best girl. The next time will be even sweeter!!
- Two supervisors. That's how many we're short right now. A fond farewell to KS, who leaves us three weeks before Christmas. Then there were two (supervisors that is. Two. Doing the work of 4). Fabulous. More work for me. Yay! Work. Ohhhhh, I can't wait. (Did you catch that sarcasm? It was suble)
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
The e-harmony update...
-9 men have closed the match
-5 of these men said it was due to the fact they were "pursuing another relationship" (I call bullshit)
-4 are from the great U.S. of A (would never consider moving)
-Communicating with 5
-2 are named Andrew and are 42 years old (I get them mixed up all the time)
-2 are named Bruce
-I've made it to step 3 (which, I should clarify is NOT the same as third base...) with Andrew1 (and it won't go much further...he can't stand women who can't manage their finances...hmmmmm....ok....not so bad except that he also can't stand women who curse. Well,
-I've made it to step 2 with Andrew2 (and it won't go much further....as I'm trying to keep an open mind, I've ignored the fact that this man is not the least bit attractive. I know it sounds mean, it is mean. But if the attraction isn't there, it just isn't there. Right? Am I being petty?)
-And three haven't gone past step 1.
I guess I won't be doing a commercial any time soon.
Recently, a fellow blogger (f8hasit) gave me an award! I totally suggest you check out her blog because I just think she is hilarious. And it's getting to be winter. I don't know what winter means where you live, but here it means rain. And more rain. And then more rain. You get the idea. Spend the afternoon reading her blog, drinking some tea (or wine, or Vodka...I'm not judging) and the rain won't seem so...rainy...
4. I can't dance. Seriously, I got no rhythm. I dance like a white girl. I can move my feet or I can move my arms, but I cannot for the life of me move both at the same time without looking like I have to pee. Throw hip girating into the mix and I look like I'm having a seizure.
5. I don't drink water. I hate the taste...makes me gag. I get my fluid intake from coffee. Mmmmmm, coffee. I love coffee. Mmmmmm, Pepsi's good too!
6. I contemplate everything, no...I mean everything. In fact, some would think it's borderline worrying. To be absolutely honest, psychiatrists call it 'generalized anxiety disorder' and they give me this pretty pink pill to take every day so I don't drive myself mad with worry. If I'm having a really bad day, I have a cute little blue one that dissolves under my tongue. Oh the miracle of modern medicine, really quite spectacular. Seriously, though...I'm really quite vocal about my 'disorder' because it horrifies me how many people suffer from mental illnesses and don't get help because it's taboo. If your leg is broken, you go to the doctor and he fixes it. Why can't it be the same if your brain is broken?
7. I feel inadequate in every aspect of my life, every single day. I'm not the mother I could be, I'm not the daughter or sister or friend I should be. I should be more spontaneous and less fearful. I should be kinder and more thoughtful. I should reduce my carbon footprint and recycle more. Basically, I should single handedly save the world and everyone in it. It's an exhausting job, but someone's gotta do it.
Wow, that was cathartic...and thank you once again, f8hasit!
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
the end result...
(p.s. don't mind Q's 'art supplies' in the background...)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
- Small Child
Now, we're pretty sure that what they meant was there were clothes and toys for a small child in the box. I say 'pretty sure' because we didn't actually check...and secretly, I think we're all waiting for a news story out of India about a small child that was mailed by Canada Post. And there would be a quote from the shipper that said, "Well, I wasn't trying to hide anything...I declared it..." I say we're all still waiting because it was sent surface, which is postal jargon for 'by boat' which is a good 6 to 8 weeks, if we're lucky.... Another person didn't have a stamp, so she taped .54 cents to the envelope... You'd be surprised how many people drop their rent money, or their Visa payment or their pay check in the mail in a completely nondescript blank, unsealed envelope. Of course, it's usually a wad of crisp 100 dollar bills - $3000.00, once. But I think you'd all be more surprised at how many people get said envelope back with all the cash inside (us posties might be a lot of things, but we believe in honest pay for an honest day.) Wallets, and cell phones, and hotel keys (oh my!) You'd also be surprised (and by surprised, I mean disgusted) by what people put inside mailboxes. Dirty diapers, used tampons, feces (maybe dog, maybe human...I'm not about to do any 'tests'), used syringes, broken glass, a loaded gun (street letter boxes come in handy when you're running from the law...) These are just a few of the things we've seen. Nothing is more exciting than opening a bag of mail after a long weekend, let me tell ya. But I've also seen a couple of interesting companies that I thought I'd share. If you're crazy about buying online, you might want to check these places out... www.gojane.com - super trendy, cheap clothes...need I say more? www.solestruck.com - honestly, I'd buy just because of the absolutely creative name, but discounted brand name shoes...well, twist my rubber arm... www.wiggle.co.uk - now, I'm not one to ride a bike, something about the seat being less than a third the size of my arse, but I'm a sucker for a box with cool writing, so I googled...
And of course, my favourite, www.ebay.ca all your addiction needs rolled into one!