Setting the scene:
Me: in bathroom...inspecting my large pores and plucking eyebrows. In barges the kid...
Q: What are these? (holds up a pack of cigarettes)
Me: Where did you find those?
Q: In your purse. What are they?
Me: uhhhh....they're smokes...
Q: I'm throwing them out.
Q leaves. I continue plucking.
Q: What are these? (holds up matches)
Me: They're matches....
Q: How much do smokes cost?
Me: About $10.00
Q: You can't afford that. You only had $100 in your bank account (recounting a random number I gave him when he wanted me to buy him a toy and I told him I didn't have enough money.."How Much?" he asked..."$100.00," I replied. This kid remembers everything!!) and then you spent $10.00? On smokes? Now you only have $90.00.
Me: You're right.
Q: And do you want to die? You could die. Tomorrow.
Me: No. I don't want to die. You're right.
Q leaves the room...
Me: Hey dude?
Me: Um....what were you doing looking through my purse?
Q: Looking for candy. If you really wanted to hide your smokes, you should have put them in here (holds up my makeup bag). I wouldn't have looked in here for candy.
What am I going to do? Take four...