Small Miracles in the Hardware Store

Did I ever tell you how I met my plunger?

I know, right?  Not many people have memorable stories about how they "met" their plunger.  And yes, I am talking about the one that fixes uh...jams...in the toilet.  I think I told y'all what I did with that plunger here, but I never told you how we met.

So, one of the characteristics of a woman who lives on her own is that she has to fix/do things that men typically do.  Oh I know, all the women's lib groups say that women can do everything a man can do and I agree with that totally.  I just believe there are things that women shouldn't have to do.  Taking out the garbage and changing the oil in the car are two such things.  I think that women are beautiful, delicate flowers and shouldn't have to smell nor touch such nastiness.

Unfortunately these thing still have to get done and so I have to do them (although since Q has become of  chore age, taking out the garbage is so his.)  I put together an elliptical machine and then took it apart after a year and a half when I gave it away - near new condition too.  I fixed the vacuum cleaner when it stopped sucking.  I try to remember to get my oil changed on time, but don't actually do it myself.  

Experience has taught me that when your toilet is jammed up, wait a while and it'll sort itself out.  But this one was snug.  It was not going anywhere any time soon.  

After work, I stop off at the closest hardware store.  And this place is huge.  Huge.  And it smells like plastic, like I just walked into a Payless Shoes.  I start to feel dizzy and disoriented.  I'm almost starting to sweat, but like a true lady, I don't sweat, so...

I take a deep breath.

"God," I say. "I'm going to need your help.  How on earth am I going to find a plunger??"

Well, listen to this.  

First aisle I stroll down is a father with his young son.  The father is distracted, talking on his cell phone.  His son has made a mess...

...of plungers.

Probably about 10 plungers, strewn all down the aisle.  Different types, sizes, even colours, all lined up just for me.  

Who says that God doesn't have a sense of humor?  That he doesn't answer prayers?

Thank God for small miracles!

What You Gonna Wish For?

Last week, I was in need of a plunger.

We have one of those new toilets, where you can flush a lot or a little.  Every time I flush a little, I feel like I'm saving the world, so it's awesome in that sense.  But...if you flush a little when you should have flushed a lot, it tends to get baaaaaacked up.  Add a nine year old boy who feels the need to use half a roll of T.P. - well, we were in need of a plunger.  

I go to the hardware store in my wedges and my cute polka dot skirt, and I'm all like, "How on earth am I going to find a plunger in here???  This place is huge..." when I stumble upon plungers all the way down the aisle.  This adorable little boy had decided to plunge the whole plumbing aisle, yes, but I prefer to think someone upstairs with a humour was looking out for me, and kind of went "uhhhhhh, here they are!!!!"

So I go home and I plunge.  And I plunge.  I plunge for a good ten minutes.  There were a few dry heaves in between, I'm not going to lie...but I plunged that toilet until we could flush without any fear of overflow.

And I thought to myself, "Well, well, well, reason 593 why I do not need a man!"  

Here's a funny thing:

When I fell for Mr. Ex, I was really looking for someone to take care of me.  In fact, I've always been attracted to men that were older than me, for that very reason.  I wanted to be taken care of.  Mr. Ex was financially stable.  He had a career.  He owned a house.  To me, these things seemed to equal security, safety and happiness.

Turns out...they didn't.

My dating life has been a search for someone to take care of me.  I realized this recently.  I've silently been asking for, waiting for someone to take care of me.

The funny thing?  While plunging that toilet, I realized I found that person.  

She was with me all along.  Somehow, without even noticing, I became the very person I needed.  

I'm not quite sure if I was crying from the overwhelming smell or from the overwhelming pride welling up within me.  It's funny how you get what you ask for.  Sometimes, you need to be prepared for what you ask for.  I was looking for a knight in shining armor.  

Instead, I found myself.