Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Cry Fat Cry

I've been handling PMS this month pretty well, I'd like to say.  I only cried once at work, when my employee showed me a picture of her dog on her phone.  I know, totally random, right?  What can I say, those eyes just sucked me right in.  And then there was today when I was regaling my colleagues with stories of how I'd get over a break up.  To be fair, we were all *sharing* and I thought it was funny that I fantasized about spray painting some one's house in the middle of the night and unhitching the hood of the car so that when he drove it would *accidentally* open on the highway.  They were all looking at me a little weird, and evidently they all missed the point, which was.....I didn't actually do any of those things.  I just thought about doing them.  But note to self (and everyone else out there...):  It's not very funny.  It's "crazy", according to my co-workers.

I've not been handling the *Working Out* very well this month.  I just can't seem to figure out how to fit it into a schedule when I'm so completely exhausted.  Do I wake up extra early in the morning? Do I do it after work when I'm beat?  I just don't know where/when it fits.

I am doing a few things differently, though.  I'm taking an ACAI (I like to pronounce it properly...A-sigh-EEE) supplement in the hope it will help me burn fat faster, plus it is a really good anti-oxidant, so they say.  I'm also taking a multi vitamin, because I heard on this morning show that I listen to every morning on my way into work that it helps fill in the spots that your diet misses and if you fill all those spots, you're not as tired and you don't crave crappy food that you crave when you have spots missing in your diet.  

(Please note that at this point my computer froze and I lost the rest of my post.  I have recreated as much as I could remember, but I was much wittier the first time round...)

But I don't notice a difference.  Yet.  I don't want to be supermodel thin.  I want to just be healthy.  I want to be comfortable.  I want to be happy with my body.  I don't want to run the Boston Marathon, but I do want to be able to plank for like two minutes (my record right now is somewhere around 8 seconds), do sit ups and push ups, and go on the elliptical for an hour feeling good, not cursing it every single minute.  I want my body to show me all the awesome things it can do.  I wouldn't mind eating an ice cream cone without feeling guilty either.  That would be fabulous.

A year ago I was a smoker.  So I figure if I can quit that, I can do anything.  I look to motivational sayings for inspiration.  Like this one...

And this one...I really like.  Especially for a perfectionist like me.  It doesn't really matter how I do it, or how well I do, or what I look like while I do it...all that matters is that I do it.  

What's your inspiration for working out???  My real true super inspiration is not being the fat sister at the wedding in January.  

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