I quit smoking 6 weeks ago today.
(Cue Fanfare)
It truly pains me to mention the benefits I've noticed since my last puff...only because I am still mourning the loss of my old friend. But here goes anyways...
I have loads more energy. I can walk up a flight of stairs and not get winded. So, you know, that's nice. I'm not going to be running a marathon anytime soon, but I can enjoy a walk with Molly without wanting to die. I am not as tired. When I smoked, I yawned all the time and generally was just lethargic. Since I've quit I don't need afternoon naps. Go figure! My skin is glowing. Glowing! I don't look a pale shade of grey anymore. My skin is pink and rosy and my troublesome acne is GONE. I've always wondered why I still get zits in my thirties. Huh, now I know!
And then there's the obvious...I have more money, not spending $10.00 every two days on a pack of cigs. And I don't smell like stale smoke. My hands don't smell, my hair doesn't smell and my clothes don't smell. I'm not I'm not ruled by the iron cigarette, the craving that is.
This time round, I haven't replaced my cravings for a cigarette with chocolate bars and candy and pastries and chocolate and more chocolate. Instead I eat a carrot, or a handful of nuts or some dried fruit. So....I haven't gained any weight this time around. This is absolutely fabulous - because I still have to lose the 15lbs I gained the last time I quit.
And yet, every single time I see someone smoke I think, "Oh, they're soooooo lucky!" When I walk by someone smoking, I breathe in extra deep and fondly remember my old friend. I haven't gotten to the point yet where I loathe cigarettes. This is the point to which every non-smoking smoker must reach. I know that in order for me to remain a non-smoker I have to learn to hate everything about them...the smell, the hold it has on your life, the way it robs your bank account every two days, the obvious health ramifications. I'm not quite there yet. Of course, I realize the benefits of smoking, and I absolutely appreciate them. I still really just miss my friend.
hmmmmm. I'm guessing that second to last sentence is a typo, and you missed out the word "not". If not, what are the benefits...exactly?
ReplyDeleteuh....ya....typo....that's it...
ReplyDeleteMore like freudian slip, I think...but yes, I absolutely meant *not* smoking.
Congratulations...I have been following your brave struggle...and hoping you would succeed! I've remained silent (well your first several posts were rather scary and I didn't think you wanted any happy-happy-congrats then)...I will tell you I grew up in a house with 2 parents who smoked heavily and didn't realize until I moved away how much i must have carried that smell of smoke on my own self all those years. When I would return home to visit the pervasive smell of smoke became more uncomfortable. The saddest part of the story is that both of my parents died of lung cancer - Mom at 69 yrs old and Dad only a couple years later at 73. You are doing a wonderful thing for yourself and for Q.
ReplyDeleteCatherine
ReplyDeleteI have not smoked since March 11th, and have done
it cold turkey, I did get a prescription from the
doctor but so far have not needed it, no cravings
and am not stuffing my face, and yes I need to lose weight too....... I never thought I could
do it but once your mind is set it is easy, so keep it up..
Hey there! Congrats on 6 weeks!!
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Jenni
@karen - that just breaks my heart. The last think I want my son to remember me for is how I died. Thank you.
ReplyDelete@sheila - Woot woot! Is this THE Sheila?? The one thing I've noticed about not smoking is that the thought of not smoking is WAY worse than actually not smoking...