Thursday, April 7, 2011

Things that are Annoying me Today...

1.  (how is that for no preamble or anything) My ex totally not respecting my time.  At all.  That is so annoying because it just shows that he doesn't respect me.  It's okay to waste my time because it's inconsequential to him.  It doesn't matter to him.  MEN:  If any of you read this blog...consider this...When you are late, when you dilly dally around, this is what women hear:  "Hey hon, guess what, you don't matter."  Seriously...that's what you  might as well be saying.  Next time, remember that.  WOMEN:  You're welcome.  Again

2.  I never ever was going to be *that* mom who's kids had never been to McDonalds.  I love McDonalds and to be honest with you...I always knew that I was way too lazy to make dinner *every* single night.  Thursday nights when I pick up Q, we go to Mickey D's, we sit in the play area, he plays, I digest.  We're all happy.  Except for tonight...first of all, I have the *loud talker* mom.  You've all met a loud talker mom.  They're the ones who want everyone to know what a wonderful mom they are.  They're attentive, they're witty, they're loving, they're loud.  "Owen, do you have to poo-poo?"  and in the next breath "Don't forget to eat all your french fries, Darling."  I don't need to know the digestive cycle of other people's kids.  I have a six year old child who likes to *show* me the size of his number 2's.  That's enough for me, thanks.  Second is the inattentive mother...the one who's too busy talking on her phone, reading a book, or praying someone will kidnap her child while she's *not watching* them.  There were these two boys who decided to play war.  "I just shot you.  I shot you in the face.  You're dead"  Verbatim, that is.  Why/How does a child know that is even an option in this world?  It makes me sick.  Unfortunately, our date to Mickey D's was cut short tonight because I did not want my child playing war with two kids blowing each other's brains out.  The mother was oblivious to the violence oozing from her children.  It makes me sad, really.  I had to resist the urge to *supervise* the situation.

3.  Traffic.  I just have one thing to say about this...get out of my way.  That is all.  Thank you.  Oh.  No, no it's not.  One more thing.  Don't get in accidents, please!  Do you know how absolutely annoying it is when I'm in lane 2 of 6 and we all have to merge into one on a bridge because you've clogged up two lanes with your four car pile up.  And tell me, what four car pile up is complete without 3 police cars, a tow truck and an ambulance?  Exactly. 

4.  This headache behind my left eye that I've had forever.  I wonder if it's a tumour.  I also wonder if it's a headache or an eye ache and how do you tell the difference?

5.  Renting a house that's for sale.  If you're considering this, I would seriously caution you against it.  It is a pain in the cheeks.  Not only do you have to keep the house clean All. The. Time, but you also have to leave the house at the drop of a hat so someone can come look at it.  I cannot wait til this month is over and we are in our new home.  I've had it up to here.

6.  Being a female player in a male dominated game/industry.  I get that men who have small *ahem* brains seem to have this overwhelming need to prove themselves in other ways.  Thing is, they're not smart enough.  Try blaming me for your inadequacies, and you'll realize how inadequate you really, truly are.  Thing is, so will everyone else.  And I'll do it in the most pleasant way possible, so you'll find it so difficult to hate me...especially because you're not quite sure if I was really smart enough to pull off what I just pulled off.  Jerk.

7.  Married men who don't wear wedding rings.  Just in case you guys didn't know this...it's a sign for us single women.  So put your friggin ring on.  Thanks.

8.  Elections and the mud slinging that ensues.  Can't we win an election by telling everyone how fabulous we are instead of because we told everyone how horrible they are?  And 4 elections in 7 years?  I haven't changed my mind, okay?  If you want to know, I'm MORE conservative than the conservative government.  Isn't that insane?  I had absolutely no idea. 

And no, I'm not PMS-ing.  I'm just having an angry rant.  Hmmmm, who knew happy people could have bad days.  You know what else makes me mad?  When you're having a perfectly fabulous day and someone comes along and dumps on you.  Hope that hasn't happened to you.

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