Sunday, August 30, 2009

The Burning Truth

I can recall many reasons why I should not cook...the food poisoning at a dinner party, the stove fires just to name a couple. But friday takes the cake (pardon the cooking reference...) While making mac n' cheese for Q and his lil buddy, I inadvertently poured boiling hot water down the front of me. Normally, I'm pretty good with multitasking, at work and at home. Note to self: Hot water and multtasking do not go hand in hand.
I'm so dedicated to work that the first thing I did was call my boss to let her know I might not be in to work. (Side note: I also did this once when I was in a car accident on my way into work. While waiting for the ambulance to take me to the hospital, I called my job to let them know I might be late...I know, considerate, right? Dedicated, absolutely!!) To which she replied, "Why are you calling me? Go to the hospital!!" Truthfully, this option never even crossed my mind. First of all, as a hypocondriac, I would run to the hospital every other day if I didn't have self restraint. So, as a result, I tend to NOT go when I should. Second, sitting in emerg for 6 hours is definitely not my idea of fun, even if it does get me out of going to work...
I decided to call healthlink. Healthlink is my best friend. I have a registered nurse at my fingertips, and she tells me whether or not I'm being ridiculous (most of the time I am...) Turns out, this time I was being in, she wanted to call 911 for me. Evidently, 2nd degree burns over 2-5 % of your body are kind of a big deal. I quickly assured her I would get to the hospital asap and she did not have to bother paramedics to get me there. After all, they are on strike...
**Please note - I'm still making the mac n' cheese while making aforementioned phone calls **
So, I knock on my girlfriend's door and ask her to drive me to the hospital. We drop the kids at a neighbours on the way. Get this...2nd degree burns get you on the super fast track at the hospital. Not just the fast track, the super fast track. I was seen by a doctor in less than an hour. LESS THAN A HOUR!! And the waiting room was packed. There was a guy in handcuffs to my right (with 2 police escorts) and a guy in a cowboy hat to my left.
A tetanus shot and a few wrappings later, I was on my way. I was a little disappointed though, no one said "STAT" even once. And my doctor wasn't tall, dark and handsome. She was short, chubby, and well...female. The one lesson I learned was 'always be prepared' and not in the way you would think. If someone's gonna see me naked (even a short, chubby ER doc) I really wish I was well groomed. Dammit if my legs weren't hairy and a bikini wax was definitely in order. I am staying away from the stove for at least the weekend, much to the surprise and gratefulness of Q!


  1. good,good mommy, keep it going.

  2. You are supposed to set the STOVE on fire, not you. After going through two kitchen fire extinguishers, and eventually blowing a big hole in the top of my stove by short-circuiting it when I tried to fix it, I have a new stove. Needless to say, I got the extended warranty from Sears.
    Take care of those burns. Luckily kids usually like peanut butter and jam.